20 Things They Don't Tell You Will Happen After "Pushing a Baby Out"

20 Things They Don't Tell You Will Happen After "Pushing a Baby Out"
Mummy Mumbles

So you're pregnant with your very first child. Not sure what to expect, but happy to think of the future you have with your baby ahead, complete with first steps, baby coos and smiles, and later on in life, a grown human doing things in the world that you can take credit for. But what about the things that they don't tell you? You know, those moms who have been-there-done-that?

British mommy blogger Mummy Mumbles gives us a few things to keep in mind before "pushing a baby out." Read her tips in her words below, also seen here.

The After Pains

Pain. After. Who knew? When God designed women to give birth, he well and truly screwed us over....

Your First Wee

Take a jug with you and pour it over your bits like you're trying to be a star in some very disturbing porno. It helps. 

Your First Poo

Do not panic. You are not having another baby. It just feels that way. But just remember the size of the thing you pushed out of the front bit, and the prospect of pushing out what's in the back bit won't be quite so daunting. Your bum is not falling out. Or it might be. If you have piles. Which you probably do...

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